I miss you..
are they? i’m not so sure,
i don’t notice that kind of stuff very often. i should though shouldn’t i?
spending so much time observing and understanding others but still i’m horrible at knowing when someone feels any sort of beneficial nature towards me.
does that make me a bad person?
i bet it does. i don’t mean for it i swear. i’m so easily caught up in one thing or another but that’s no excuse. i’m not the best type either. i’m indecisive as hell. so much so i stay awake at night just contemplating what kind of person i want to be. or one others would want me to be. should i be polite and kind? or would that make me look like a suck up. should i be funny and outgoing? or would i seem obnoxious. should i be quiet and reserved? or would that make me out to be a stranger. why do i even think so much into it. why not just be who i naturally am. the problem is sometimes i really don’t know.
how am i supposed to notice someone else so easily if i can’t even recognize myself. believe me though i want to. i try so very hard to please others. to make them like me but i hate myself for it. everyone wants someone else to make them feel so very special. someone they don’t have to share with anyone else. but i can’t do that for you.